There are many stories which we choose not to share, for one reason or another. Perhaps it is related to shame or embarrassment. Or maybe we just hold them so dear, that in sharing them they would become devalued.
I feel comfortable telling you about this rather unusual situation. It’s something I feel we can explore together. Let me tell you all about it. One of my visitors recently brought a rather unusual collection of note books with him when he came in to my studio. He was an elderly man, I will not give very many details, as I would not wish to identify him in any way.
Wrapped in brown paper, of the sort people used for parcels many years ago, these note books were dusty hand written relics. I can well imagine them being tossed out with the trash when someone moved house, or recycled along with old copies of magazines when clearing out a loft or basement.
My visitor explained that they were among his mother’s personal papers in her house, which he had inherited years earlier. For the purposes of this document we will name her ‘Valerie’. The papers had never really been sorted through as there was nothing of much importance there, Valerie having been well organised and having secured all the financial documents with the family lawyer.
You will understand then, that the contents of these papers were at first a mystery, then quite surprising – and ultimately quite shocking. The following is an edited version, mostly to protect the innocent, or not so innocent, and partly to keep the identity of my visitor confidential.
I would estimate the contents to have been written variously between about 1955 and 1973. I can only assume my Valerie’s notebooks were written for her own satisfaction, or perhaps to one day share with someone completely unconnected with the events portrayed.
All that said, as you will doubtless see, the contents help explain her son’s unusual tastes in his personal entertainment. I should say that once he discerned the nature of the content he immediately stopped reading, having barely read the first few pages. At first he was unsure what to do with the material, even thinking of burning the precious documents. He said they made him profoundly uncomfortable.
My own interest was not so easily deflected. After studying the notebooks I decided on a rather different course. Hisparticular interest was to be dressed and made to perform a number of humiliating tasks. Dressed as a young girl and forced to perform the duties (and personal services) suited to a young girl, he found a secret pleasure that surmounted anything else he had ever experienced. My assistant Stacy and I were always pleased to see him.
Over the coming weeks I would often have him perform certain tasks, culminating with him being made to stand in the corner, on pain of a firmly applied spanking, and then listen to stories read variously by myself or Stacy. The stories of course, were the contents of his mother’s note books.
Valerie had such a lovely expressive style. Really, it was a delight to read to my visitor. Watching him squirm, unable to ‘unhear’ his mothers lascivious words was a delightful form of mental torture, of the kind I find simply delightful.
So, having witnessed the profound affect these writing had on my visitor I am now pleased to be able to share them with you. I should warn you this writing are what today we would describe as Not Safe For Work.
I hope you will forgive some of the editing. It’s been done to protect others, and wherever possible I’ve maintained the spirit of this extraordinary lady’s words.
You will need to be registered on the site, though there’s no charge for this, to get access to these important papers. I want you to enjoy them, but let’s be discrete here and offer the respect these valuable documents deserve.
You can show your respect and support by joining my Premium Program HERE for the extremely generous subscription of $29.75 a year.